I cannot believe that it has nearly been half a year for me since I started this amazing journey. March 21, 2014 was seminar where I walked in notebook in hand and listened to the doctors speak, tonight for the second time I am going to be that person speaking. I am a shadow of my former self. It is really hard to believe that I am the person looking back into the mirror.
Six months ago as I was being wheeled into the Operating Theater ( love the way the Brits do it), I did not know what it was going to entail. I did not know what was going to happen or how many lbs I was going to lose, what would become of me. Well I have to say the results are beyond anything I expected.
May 16 2014 I was being wheeled into surgery and woke up it was pain... I just remember pain. Below is a picture of me and my friend Jasmin we met at seminar we are completely different people.
A total of 175lbs lost between the two of us. We Both were sleeved by Dr. Maffei.
WLS has changed my entire life. It has taken a huge weight off of me.
Hey all we are now going to be talking about one of my favorite topics shopping. Even when I was heavier, I was still a shopper. I knew where to score the deals on handbags, accessories and my all time favorite shoes... ah shoes... Now that I am sleeved and 97lbs down as of today three more to go to onederland and 44 to goal. I cannot believe how close it all is. Anyway I got inspiration about this post from something that happened to me today. My Mom and I decided to start cleaning out the front hall closet and see what fit me and did not cause the weather is getting cold here in New York. I had about a zillion coats, all of them did not fit, they hung off me like a skeleton. I said to my Mom I have nothing to wear. I only had a white fleece I got at walmart and a fake leather jacket and neither one is warm. Ah the fleece is actually ok. So I ventured out today and decided that I needed to get my warm jackets for the winter where to go! In this post I am going to list my four most frequented shops and rewards programs they have. I DO NOT like to use store credit cards as I got in a lot of trouble with them back in the day but ah sweet memories. So I went about shopping today and got two beautiful coats! One from TJ Maxx and another one from Annie Sez. The White Coat is a Beautiful Chinese Laundry Winter Coat Size XL
The Black Coat is From Annie Sez Ivanka Trump Size 16
Please excise the yoga pants I was coming back from the gym. Anyway here is my experience at all of these stores. The stores I frequent the most are as following 1. Kohls 2. Walmart 3. Target 4. Annie Sez 5. TJ Maxx 6. Old Navy 7. ThreadUp.com ( this one rocks) So I am going to start with Kohls since I worked there in college and high school. Kohls: Kohls is an excellent place to shop, it is worth signing up for the email alerts as they give you head ups to sales. Also, their credit card is good decent interest rate this is the only store card I have, you get discounts and mailers all the time. There is always a sale there and they carry a lot of good brands such as Lauren Conrad, Vera Wang, J Lo and Vera Wang. I always come out of there with something. I go to Kohls for work clothes mainly, I really love LOVE their clearance section. Their clearance can go as low as 90 percent in the off season great time to stock up on basics, like undershirt, shorts and gym clothes things you can use all year round. I go there when I need basics ie bras, underwear etc.. Kohls has a great selection in all sizes. Their return policies are legendary. You can return something years later for store credit. I know this because personally I have done this and seen many people use it. Its like the old Macys. You can return, even exchange without a receipt and even return from online in the store. Overall, Kohls is a great all around store. Walmart Yes I know I am a democrat that shocking I shop at evil empire. Anyway I am sorry their clothes are dirt cheap and I do not feel guilty about using them once. I love walmart for pajamas, basics and under clothes. Their selection is wide and they carry a variety in their stores. They also have generous return policies which you can usually get money back or a gift card. I also like it there because you can get beauty, products, tampons and other stuff you might need. Their credit card is terrible no real discounts. Overall, I like walmart for basics. Target ( Targe) Target is just the greatest place on earth, Target has wonderful clothes, often carries designer lines for a one time only. I LOVE THEIR JEANS! Mossimo skinny jeans go up to an 18 and just fit in all the right places. Target I cannot say enough High Class Walmart Annie Sez Alright this place is a hit or miss. They used to be owned by an American Company back in the day. I went to my local one I had not been there in years and I had a gift card my parents got me there for my bday I wanted to use it. Their signs in the store say EVERYTHING UNDER 25.00 EXCEPT OUTERWEAR. I was like ooh bargains... Well I went in and I have to tell you they were just brought out by a Canadian Company and carry a lot of brands Americans would not be familiar with but their from our friendly friends to the North. Anyway they have a great selection of sweaters, tops,dresses, yoga pants and work clothing. And you cannot beat the prices. Here is where it gets tricky I always sign up for store credit cards if I am going to get a big discounts. I signed up and got 30 percent off my first purchase. Now that was nice I discount so I bought some stuff. I went home and the jeans were too big so I put them in my return pile. I also had another pair of jeans that were not listed as petite but they were for munchkins I am 5"7. So I got them and put them in the bag and they the tags on them. So I go up to the counter and say I want to return these. Oh do you have your receipt I said I did not but I had the credit card and could they look it up. The start fighting with me so I left cause it was not worth it. I then made a mental note that I need to make sure I keep receipt from there. So I went today and I got a retail me or not alert on my iphone that there were 30 percent off outerwear. I KNEW YES! So I went got my coat my new beautiful coat and I showed the phone coupon. Oh you cant use it because it has to be printed out... I was ready to scream. Their policies SUCK at Annie Sez but the prices and clothes are of good quality. So as a warning only go there and make sure you keep the reciept. Also, sign up for their email alerts I just did and got 20 percent off. TJMAXX This is the place also Marshalls, they are owned by TJX companies. OMG I love this place. Designer duds for low prices. I still remember my best purchase from there. I got a Michael Kors bag for 45.00 originally 190. They are fair, their prices are good for what you are getting. I saw this amazing pair of Cowboy Boots I was gonna buy well they were 300.00 not happening. I just got amazing knee high boots from them omg I LOVE THEM. TJ MAXX is a place to go. Plus they have this new TJX Access program sign up for it. You get points each time yoi shop there. Its amazing.. sign up for that and emails. Their return policies are great. Old Navy This is still an oldie but a goodie. They have the best jeans I wear their Rockstar style jeans they fit me just right. Good quality, good prices and great selection. Also when I was a larger woman I shopped there all the time cause they had a lot of sizes and their plus size selection online is great. Their return policies are great order online return in store and they do not make a huge deal. Their credit card is not worth it. Thredup.com I thank my bariatric friend Breanna for this one! Go to www.threadup.com, its a consignment shop online with amazing stuff. Stores, people and others donate stuff to them and when coach wants to get rid of bags they send it to them. I am telling you deep deep discounts. They also have this great program called Clean Out Bag, you order it from the website and it is sent to you in the mail. Its a large bag that has a pre paid shipping label fill it up with as much as you can send it in to them. It takes awhile for them to process it and go through it but do not and I repeat sign up for return assurance cause that means all your clothes you do not want back to you. They will donate them to charity and you never have to see the clothes again. The clothes they accept they credit you on their website and you can buy whatever you want. I LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS PLACE. I have done the bag thing twice and just ordered a third one.
My Overall Opinion: Shopping while being a WLS patient is exciting. Enjoy the process you will love the new beautiful you! I know I love the new me
Each day another piece of me is chipped away. Revealing who I was all along.
I look in the mirror and I do not recognize the woman standing and staring back at me. Who is she? Is she me? This is how I feel sometimes, and I feel like I need to meet myself again.
It goes something like this I wake up eat breakfast, work out, take care of the puppy and then I get dressed. Standing there in my underclothes I admire this new woman in the mirror who is she? Is it really me? I then realize the voice is the same, the genetics are the same, but she is not the same.
I had always wanted to be thin, I was 160lbs in my head my entire life. I was thin for a very short period in middle school until my PCOS wrecked havoc and ruined my body. This woman was always standing there inside of me.
I was always the friend who went shopping and stood by as all my normal sized friends found clothes, I would sit there and and go ooh look earrings. I wanted those clothes, I would promise myself that I would need to make a change. The constant cycle of yes I will be good I promise myself I will be. I am going to be fine.
As I am here now five months out on October 16, 2014 and over 90lbs gone I am shocked at the woman standing in front of the mirror. I am thinner the double chin is gone, I have beautiful long limbs, bones are felt in various places. Who she is... oh wait is me Katie. The hair is darker, the look is sharper she cares for who she is. Her make up is applied neatly, her hands are painted a daring shade of purple. Her complexion is clear, radiant glowing. The voice is no longer the same, she has confidence, strength, opinions, knows what she wants, she is goal oriented, less anxious. She knows she has arrived, her family notices the difference in her.
What has become of the black sheep of the family as she always felt, now she is the one with the confidence and looks to kill. She always felt beautiful but as her weight spiraled upwards she felt ugly and not attractive. As she sat down at the diner and couldn't fit why not have the extra fries and dessert who cares. It did not matter.
Who has she become? She is evolving all I know is I love the person I am becoming.
Above is a picture of my stomach looks like now and I do not have a gallbladder. A friend of mine asked me the other day " Katie what does it feel like when you eat?" I realized I think no one has ever asked me that and I have never been able to describe it. Well for times sake I sat down at home today and I figured it out with my breakfast, lunch and dinner? What did it used to feel when I ate? An empty feeling I was never full and I kept on going until I got sick. What does it feel like now? Hmm.... liquids go down easy on most days but some days it hurts for them to get down and I do not want them. These are what I call my crystal light days where flavored water is all I can get down. When I eat it feeels interesting if it is a full liquid it goes down but when it gets to the bottom to my stomach it stops and I have to wait. It just is really a weird full feeling
Women and clothes ahh the oldest cliche in the book, we love to shop and spend money we do not have. Shows like Sex and the City, Confessions of a Shopaholic have really made the name game when it comes to women and their clothes. But when you are a WLS patient clothes take on a whole life of their own...
We might have started off with a substantial plus size wardrobe various sizes ranging from 20W and onward.. and then we make the decision to have surgery. Knowing these very clothes are going to be mere memories. But you still hold on to them for those first few weeks because you are swollen, your bloated, your still fat and you know they will fit. Then the first drop happens, this is what happened to me. I was walking somewhere and my leggings fell down and they were saggy in the ass. I knew I had made the next drop. So the first donation to Goodwill came around 6 weeks post op, at this point all my clothes were sagging and I was finding myself go to Walmart, Target and Kohls.
Now I am down almost 90lbs and hovering somewhere between a size 16, they are little tight but fit amazing. I have piles of clothes everywhere in my room I am not a messy person by nature but the sheer amount of clothing is insane. I realized that I need to get clothes for the Fall and Winter. So I went to Walmart yesterday and dropped around 150.00 on some shirts, pants and jackets.
My 600LB life is a rather popular show shown on The Learning Channel here in the United States of America. The show follows a set of morbidly obese people severly morbidly obese people in their journey towards WLS.
There is a lot of controversy about this show in the weight loss surgery community, some people feel they are lazy others see them as inspirational so on many of the boards that I am part of I do not discuss this show but since this is my personal blog I am going to discuss how I feel towards this show.
This above is a poster from the show. I could not find anything without a picture. Before I entered this journey of becoming the new healthy me, I often thought this show exploited severely obese people and made a circus out of it. That was until my wake up call, I happened to come across an episode of this on netflix in March right around the time I decided to possibly consider medical intervention. I saw the episode and in that episode I SAW MYSELF. I saw the huffing and the puffing, the food addiction, the denial, the constant ups and downs. For some reason the show hit home for me that day. I understand why now I knew I needed to change my life because I was on the path of becoming a 600lb life person. At that moment I knew surgery was going to be the answer for me.
I can still remember the moment when I decided to have surgery. I was with my Mom and my Grandma was recovering from a injury. We were visiting her and I said Mom I am having weight loss surgery and she said Katie you go for it. At that moment I started the process.
As I look back on the moments all these months ago and my sagging jeans this surgery saved my life.
The current episode I am watching of my 600lb life is Domonique. She is a lovely character who sitting right in her bed on her clear fluids I FEEL HER PAIN. I dont care what anyone says these people are us. They are all of us.
The scene they are showing now she is complaining about her pain, I remember the pain post op and I was nearly a quarter size of her. I was only 300 when I started now I am 218 last I weighed. I weigh every two weeks. I have never been this small in my entire life.
Another scene in this episode of the surgery they go in through the key hole and talk about the fat they found around her liver and organs, they found that same yellow fat in me.
We are a community of people that are close whether we are 400, 300 or 500 lbs when we begin we all take that first step into a new journey.
Remember the people on this show are our sisters and brothers, they are us. We are a community.
May 16, 2014 was the day it changed for me. I was staring down rabbit hole and looking into my new life. Four months ago to the day I was sitting in the Operating Room Prep Area, with my Mom waiting for them to wheel me in. I was 293 lbs from a whopping 300lbs thank god my insurance did not require a lot of pre weight loss. I sat there on the gurney just waiting for them to bring me down. As all the doctors and nurses came in and prepped me, the IV lines were started everything was double checked and I continued to sign my life away for all the hospital paper work. All of a sudden it was time, as the versed was injected into my IV line I was okay and then all of a sudden I started to feel woozy. I remember kissing my Mom good bye and Dad and was wheeled off down the corridor, after that it where it gets blurry. I have a remember the sensation of be transferred to the operating table and vaguely saying hi to the nurses and doctors in the room. I then fell asleep but was in this state between awake and deep anesthetic sleep. I remember the lovely anesthesiologist going to me more propofol please. After, that the next thing I remember is Katie wake up wake up its over your surgery is over. In the haze of the drugs and coming back to life I was groggily I thought to myself did I have surgery?
As I started to breathe on my own I felt sore all I remember is feeling like someone had hit me on the stomach but I had my gallbladder out before that two years ago and I knew this feeling. After this I went to recovery and barely remeber much.
Fast Forward Four Months
I am now down 82 lbs to 218. I DO NOT REGRET A SINGLE DAY
